Hate them so, so much.

So people who may not be clear on the term may also enjoy this post, allow me to first explain what a “fanboy” is: they are a moron.  I previously mentioned my disdain for zealots in other posts, but I’ve never actually called them by this term before.  To be succinct, a fanboy is someone who subscribes to any given fandom to the point of fanatical obsession.  To give an unusual example, if you believe that gas companies are raising prices for our own good and must have a perfectly good reason and are willing to debate that point of view in the face of overwhelming common sense, you could be called a “Oil Industry Fanboy”.  Not that anyone would be one, just an example.

I bring this up now because of a review that has come out for Metal Gear Solid 4: Guns of the Patriots, and the uproar it seems to have caused amongst some in the gaming community. has been a rather reputable site for getting the newest in reviews, insider looks, and . . . well . . . game trailers for some time now.  I personally find their reviews to be very informative and delivered in a fair manner.  It shouldn’t surprise me, however, that upon reviewing MGS4 every Kojima Fanboy is up in arms about the review.

That’s right; a 9.3.  Out of 10.  That’s actually a really good rating!  Not as high as many people are saying the game deserves, but it’s probably a much better rating than I would give it considering A) I don’t have a PS3, and B) I can’t stand Metal Gear Solid.  Wanna know what I can’t stand even more than Metal Gear Solid?  How about shameless product placement IN Metal Gear Solid!

See, in any other game, this would be considered annoying and condescending.  Take, for instance, the rage felt by many people towards Gillette Fusion razors after playing Burnout Paradise, or the fact that while Jason Bourne can’t remember who he is he can still remember that he uses MasterCard wherever he goes.

In many cases, however, Kojima is hailed as a visionary for including such “clever Easter eggs” in Metal Gear Solid.  Fanboys flock to his unneeded defense in proclaiming that by breaking the fourth wall and jamming a Sony cattlebrand on our skull, he is actually enhancing the story and game play experience.

Here’s the bottom line: any game “review” is in fact a game “opinion”.  If you are the biggest of fans of a series, then it doesn’t matter what anyone else says; you’re probably going to buy it, play it, and love it no matter what.  You shouldn’t care what someone else says about something you love (unless you’re secretly worried you may not actually love it as much as you claim and anyone thinking that whatever it is isn’t just God’s greatest gift to man might upset YOUR entire belief structure).

If you are one of these people, please knock it off.  Stop trolling forum boards to engage in arguments like it’s some sort of civic duty.  Just go back to enjoying whatever it is that you are so fanatical about in the first place.  If it’s worth it, it will be able to defend itself without you.


About The Author

Co-founder of and Executive Producer for Stolendroids Podcast. Also resident ‘tech-head’ and de-facto leader of the group.

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  • zohner

    Product placement in video games is absolutely brilliant. The fact that Kojima was genius enough to recognize this just goes to show that the Metal Gear franchise is the best ever. You can’t argue that fact and you know it! Product placement provides a revenue stream for the developers so that they are able to then pass consumers higher quality products at lower prices. Errr… Ummm… Stupid corporate shills. If I want to be sold something, I’ll go watch TV or read my junk mail folder.

  • Hehe, I would LOVE to see real estate offers or “get more powerful manhood” product placements in video games!

    Game rated E for Everyone. Ads rated M for Mature.