A few years ago my friends and I got into a game of geek one upsmenship. We began to compare our respective levels of geek bling. Who had the best computer, most video games, etc. For years I had a +5 to my looser rating for being the lone single man. The +5 had some benefits, but they were far outweighed by the -42 Blue Balls.

Schmidty was over at my apartment for a good bit of Sunday helping me to set up a home network, and about 27 other random tech problems that come up. Despite being a geek, and having a rather high GQ, I must admit that I honestly don’t know how half of the tech I own works. After he left I found myself flying my WoW epic mount around Outlands on my 50 inch plasma screen TV. I must say that it was honestly bad ass, and bordered on a true religious experience worthy of the Church of Gaming.

It made me think, what criteria truly measure ones GQ? Can it be quantified like your GPA, or credit score? And what are the things most important for a high GQ. Is it more impressive to have four computers, and six games consoles. Or to only have one console, but it’s a Neo Geo?

What think you?


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  • Schmidty

    You forgot to mention that you are my guinea pig for most of the tech I set up for you, so that if something goes wrong, I know what not to do when I set it up for myself. So… thank you for that 😉 haha.

    Back to the question about the GQ level, I think it has to do with what you can do with all that you have. If that one Neo Geo can allow you to play any game you want, stream movies over the internet, and control the lighting and temperature in your house, then that would be more GQ than four computer that can play WoW simultaneously. Now if you had four computers that were networked into a server farm, and you could render two hour animations in under 30 seconds, AND they cluster together to be your 8TB media server, game emulator and home environment controller, then that would be more GQ than the Neo Geo, even with all the aforementioned functions. So in my opinion, it has a lot to do with functionality.

  • Well, remember that we’re only talking about the technology geek part of it. There are other areas too.

    I think I had the top dog spot there for awhile; water cooled main computer running XP Media Center edition which piped up to my softmodded xbox extender, both of whom were pulling archived media from my home-made server, which was also publishing loads of websites and web apps out to the internet which I could remote into from any point on the planet and make modifications to it.

    We (the three of us) have all sort of leveled out, however:
    Squishy has the consoles and the TV and TiVo, but has no idea how to do anything with them and plays his games on an old Compaq which he systematically destroys every 14 months.
    Schmidty has a web service which publishes many, many websites out (Stolen Droids being one of them), has a Sony UX he uses for remote administration, multiple consoles, and a softmodded xbox that puts Squishy’s TiVo to shame. However, his computer is built out of my old parts I gave him years ago, and is waiting for death.
    I have Squishy’s hand-me-down HDTV, but it’s hooked to a home-built HTPC with two tuners and enough modifications to put both the TiVo and the softmodded xbox to shame. I use an iMac (-5 to Geek Cred) which runs Vista (+10) and is just recently modded to play Xbox 360 games. Add to that my customized file server, and my one (softmodded) console, and we’re all pretty much even with each other.

  • Red Hot

    Commenting on the current level of GQ of The Three Righteous Brothers: Squishy now has a wife who is almost as much of a geek as he is. While the wife will adamantly refuse to be known as chattle, she will consent to be “geek bling” for the benefit of her husband. Thus, Squishy still has the greater GQ. With that said, Schmidty’s wife can play a mean game of DoA, so there’s a good amount of geek cred there as well.

  • zohner

    X360 games on a computer? I’m interested in your ideas and would like to subscribe to your newsletter.

    This reminds me of a debate that we had a few years back: who’s the bigger geek: me or Carl? It seems as though I won but was defined as “a sad geek” because I don’t have anything to hold onto like Carl with Star Trek. I HAVE STAR WARS! I still say that Carl beats me because he has something that I don’t: con cred.

  • Schmidty

    In response to Red Hot’s comment: I am ashamed that even though I spent 3 hours studiously memorizing Ryu Hayabusa’s moves in DoA, Heidi then procedes to kick my trash by only repeatedly hitting the Y button. I think that lowers my GQ; just for the fact that I thought that skill would ever get me by in a button-mashing game.

  • I should clarify my X360 comment; I now have a 360 usb controller and Live! account so I can play whatever 360 games have been brought to Windows against everyone.

  • Squishy

    Actually Schmidty it just shows the inherent flaw in fighting games; that no matter how much you practice, you can still be foiled by someone repeatedly banging their head against the controller.

    I’m thinking that the best way to quantify your geekhood should be with comparison to a pop culture icon. For example. I could be rated as an 8 out of 10, which would relate to …. Neil Patrick Harris. Where as Schmidty might rate a 9 out of 10, which is Will Wheaton.

    Who else could represent Dante’s levels of geekhood?

  • Thanks to Zohner for this one!

  • zohner

    Looks like Zuke has me beat in the awkward category.

  • Schmidty
  • C’mon Squishy! Put your score where your mouth is!! lol